Sunday, May 21, 2006
Sexy Teacher
If you ever come across a film by this title, break the disc, stamp on it, crush it, burn it and throw the charred remains into the nearest rubbish chute.
Its the worst film I've ever seen.
Seriously.
Ok went for movie marathon cum study session which turned into a 98% movie and 1% work thingy.
Kinda chilled on Emma's bed the whole day.
First up, Scary Movie 4, some chinese horror thingy about rhinoceros's horns, Sexy Teacher, attempted to watch the hills have eyes but the VCD failled on us and The Wild.
Right.
On the cover Sexy Teacher looks like some lame comedy.
Its a Korean show that looks similar to My sassy girl and Volcano high or something like that.
It looks like some sorta teacher-student romantic comedy thingy.
But the synopsis at the back kinda reveals some of its erotic elements.
It says "teaches student the art of love making" or something along those lines in a more vulgar way, namely "teaching sex". :0
Right.
The cover carries no cencorship rating, we thought it was a NC-16 comedy.
We pop the disk in.
See a woman writing something on a mirror with her lipstick.
Next thing we know, a pair of boobs flash on screen.
Yay.
In other words, its a meaningless porno show that flashes lotsa boobs and nothing else so I guess it is indeed NC-16. Lol.
As expected we collapsed into a heap of giggles and hid our eyes behind blankets( For me, behind the enormous Pooh named Melson).
The television was turned off by us 3 times, only to be switched on again.
We screamed for someone to take out the disk but everyone was writhing on the bed and refused to go near the offending pictures on screen.
And then finally, the meaningless parade of boobs flashed on screen ended.
And the "story" began.
Halfway into the 3rd scene we were too numb to writhe around in laughter anymore.
Yep. We scrutinised the film and started complaining it was too cheap.
Firstly, there is no story line.
Meaningless steamy scenes make up 99% of the movie.
Secondly, there are only 2 actors who look even passingly Korean.
The rest look like Thai and Indonesian workers.
There was a fellow who looked like the Dong Li Huo Che man. You know, the long haired blokes.
Yep.
Thirdly, much of the film was filmed in a seedy motel type motel with a few scenes in someone's study room. Each steamy scene was interrupted by crap shots of buildings which seemed to serve no purpose to us.
Fourthly, this film gives new meaning to budget films.
The thing looked like it had been filmed using a VGA handphone camera.
They didn't even have enough funds to hire korean actors who look korean.
The clothes used were the same. I mean like... Ok the brassiere of the women was all the same.
In all the scenes.
We guess they must have used 2 bras to film the thing.
Yep and there was this scene where a guy picked up a clock by his bed and remarked that he was late.
Problem? The clock's battery cover was missing and there were no batteries inside.
Wow.
The limited settings also indicate the sever shortage of funds.
Our comments:
"Eew.
Yucks.
Why are they only filming boobs?
This is like... A film for dirty old Ah Peks right...
WHAT IS THAT SOUND? OMFG."
Yes there was a wierd and gross sound that was heard throughout all the "Interesting" scenes.
In conclusion:
A cheapo 3rd rated porno flick not worthy to be watched by girls.
Watch it if: You want to laugh and complain.
Right. Off to hist project now hehe.
Sherilyndel Revolted at Sunday, May 21, 2006 |
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